Ok so lets get straight to the details here Lordswood beat us 81-13 but it’s not as clear cut as that score makes it out to be...

Firstly Lordswood are a great side and quite rightly after dropping down from London SE 3 it's clear to see they've kept many of their players including a rather tiny number 8 and centre who I can only describe as deceptively fast, why a big bald man would ever learn to run that fast is beyond me I see no reason why he would ever need to run that fast except to catch up with an hot dog van or his latest mugging victim... certainly it's a quality our own "folically challenged" players have ever managed to obtain!

One more player to mention (as I know the Lordswood team read these match reports) would be the big Jessie number 4 who went off with a footballers injury but seemed to have recovered by the time he got to the bar, nice bloke though, then again easy to be nice when you've put 68 points on the opposition... scrap that! What a c*nt :)

Ok so that's enough about the unbeaten Lordswood team here's the real highlights...

Kick off! started well Holman took the ball and we proceeded to return the ball to the half way line for Flipper to run the ball into the back line and was dumped on his arse needless to say Flipper let go of the ball but to be fair he was too busy trying to get the licence plate of the truck that just hit him to worry about such silly things! Scrum down and unfortunately the back row seemed to fall asleep at that point and the 10 was left a hole in the back line bigger than Bender's bald spot (ooh dig number 2 and still so early!)...

Something happened shortly after that, no need to mention that...

Erm...

Ah yes! Brock's decided to keep ball in hand noticing that the opposition would often gift us penalties at the breakdown and with some strong support we were up the field before we knew it with Bealzy converting the penalty, well done you tiny ginger wonder of nature!

With heads high and a feeling that we could actually do this if we keep this play up we kicked off and with some strong defence turned over the ball, so surely time to keep the ball in hand and punish Lordswood again! No?

No... Mahoney decided it was time to join the back line and with a kick only matched in class by the last time a front row decided to kick for brocks we were another try down 14 - 3 but Brocks knew this was 2 silly tries of two silly errors and the game was still very much up for grabs!

Fast forward to half time, score 40 - 3... Bugger! Somehow Bender managed to lift our heads at half time and then came the hard defence! In the first 10 minutes of the 2nd half I saw a Brocks that could hold any one; back lines were formed fast and accurately, tackles were big and hard, errors were forced by pressure of all 15 players on the field working hard together... after 10 minutes of strong possession Lordswood did score one more time but nobody could be blamed really and then something pretty impressive happened Brocks pushed forward starting with return to a Lordswood kick from the Brocks wing we had moved up to the half way line, from here the forwards took huge runs at Lordswood and the backs executed their moves perfectly with strong support to back them up finished by a great break from Beaky and smashed over by Flipper for a nice little bit of revenge on that centre!

Heads held high we had a new goal from the game, hit hard make Lordswood know that even though they would take 2 points from this match they wouldn't get them without a fight, Special mention to Johan for some of the hardest hits we've seen this season even making me cringe a little...

Towards the end of the game Brocks scored again with some nice solid tight running finished by Holman himself... Captains Man-of-the-match goes to Manchild for the tackle count which may have made it into 3 figures he was simply everywhere defensively, not bad considering he also stepped up to play out of position as prop!

So we collected the 13 points against a very good team that we can all be a little proud of... but not too proud, take a look at the final 4 games of the season:

Mar 06 Askean Mar 20 Shooters Hill Mar 27 Kings Coll. Hospital Apr 10 Bexley

Now the important bit, can anyone honestly say with our current form that we should lose even one of those games? Both I and Captain Ian Bender are now calling for an undefeated end to our season... Enjoy your week off boys perhaps come down and support the 2s next week followed by a boys night out but when we come back it's time to ensure we end this season on a high!

As I managed to anger the Lordswood boys in my last report I'll simply write this for any Askean's reading:

Bring it on you tarts! I'll look for you on the field...

Written by Bomber Harris, number 4, Tall bloke wears a scrum hat can’t miss me! Certainly not written by the cheeky fat winger :)

Points earned

P.Holman                   5             A.Baker              5